" Never a perfect time , but this feels damn close . "
Kristie, known as@kristiezurmon TikTok, is a content creator and stay-at-home mom in Columbus, Ohio. In a TikTok withover a million views, she discussed her experience becoming a first-time mom in her 30s instead of her 20s with a message that is resonating with many.
In the video, Kristie is open about the pros and cons of becoming a mom at 33 years old, saying, “I know technically it’s not recommended because you [might] have a more difficult pregnancy, maybe a harder time getting pregnant, maybe you don’t bounce back as quickly; which, what does that even mean? And maybe you’re more tired. But the pros are pro-ing!”
“In my 20s, like emotionally, mentally, financially, I was not ready to be a mom. I had 15 years of being selfish, so I have no FOMO! … I’m not watching everybody’s Instagram stories traveling or going out to dinner, or going out on the weekends — and I’m not like, ‘Oh, I wish I was doing that.’”
A lot of them said they were grateful they waited for their lives to evolve so it could be slow-paced when they had their first baby. One commenter said, “First time mum at 35 and you’ve articulated it perfectly. I traveled, studied and lived [life] to the full and now I’m ready for the quiet pace of life.”
There were even women who aren’t mothers who were encouraged by Kristie’s epiphany. One woman said, “As a single, 28 y/o who honestly gets really emotional over not being married or having the kids I want so badly yet — this gives me a positive perspective + and something to look forward to. Thank you.”
It’s a reminder that having your 20s to yourself isn’t a crime if that’s how things are shaking out! One commenter replied, “24 this year and feeling rushed to get through life and accomplishments to have kids, this reminded me to slow down and enjoy what my 20s are meant for.”
In an interview with BuzzFeed, Kristie shared how she eventually got to a point where she was mentally and emotionally prepared to be a mom, “Therapy!! My formative adult years were all about survival, and I wanted to make sure I was in the best mental and emotional space for myself before adding other humans to the picture.”
“I was primarily concerned with my fertility and the potential for miscarriage. I know that’s a common worry that increases as we age, and having loved ones struggle with this put it even more in the forefront of my mind. That being said, I was very fortunate to become pregnant quickly and, aside from the first trimester, I had a really nice pregnancy!”
Kristie shared her advice for what women or families should prioritize if they’re conflicted about when to start a family, “Communication! Discuss it at length with each other and whoever you feel comfortable with. Go through multiple scenarios. And just know that no parent journey is the same. You can mother in your own unique way!”
Everyone should speak to a doctor when family planning to learn what is best for them and their body.
To see more from Kristie, you canfollow her on Tiktok!
