I ’m warn you , # 14 is so disgusting , it has deflower my day .
So obviously, crimes and humour don’t usually go hand in hand. Most crime stories are scary, and scaredy-cats like me tend to stay as far away from them as possible.
Until today, that is! Because recently, Reddit useru/Mysterious_Fan_1849asked Canadians, “What are some of the funniest crimes you’ve heard of?” and people did NOT disappoint — these answers are seriously entertaining. So without further ado, here are some of the funniest answers:
Disclaimer : Though hoi polloi claim to be mouth from their own experience with fame , BuzzFeed ca n’t sustain the validness of some of these story .
1.“I think ‘The Great Canadian Maple Syrup Heist’ is themost Canadian crimethat has ever been committed.”
– uranium / jleahul
( If you do n’t know what this is , answer it to say , some Canadians stole $ 18 million Charles Frederick Worth of maple syrup in 2011 - 2012 . It ’s one of the biggest offence in Canadian chronicle . It has also been turned into aseries on Prime Videostarring none other than Jamie Lee Curtis . )
2.“Someone put an ‘out of order’ sign on a night deposit slot at a bank with the instructions to put the deposit in the metal box that was padlocked to a tree with a heavy chain. Early the next morning, the brilliant crook unlocked it and took the box away with an undisclosed number of deposits.”
" I express joy at the simplicity of the con and the foolishness of the victim . Never heard if they were catch . "
– u / NapsAreAwesome
3.“A guy my mom knew growing up robbed our local KFC with a fake gun and a bucket of KFC for his mask. Fast forward 30 years, and he’s now a criminal defence lawyer.”
" Also fun fact , the KFC he robbed is the only KFC with a sideboard in North America . "
– u / Daniel - fohr
4.“Those two guys who kicked in the door of a house wielding hammers and demanding money. They realized that they had gone to the wrong house, apologized, gave them cash to help fix their door, and left.”
– u / CherryCherry5
5.“The two cops that overdosed on some seized pot and called for help, thinking they were already dead.”
– u / justino764
6.My dad was an RCMP officer in Northern Alberta during the ’70s/’80s. Apparently one summer, they had a suspect escape custody. The guy fled into a bush, but during the escape, he had lost his shirt, so he ran into the trees bare-chested. It was close to nighttime, and they were a good ways away from any towns, so they didn’t even pursue the guy, they just waited. The next morning, the guy turned himself in. There wasn’t a spot of exposed skin on his body wasn’t bitten by mosquitoes, just a swollen red welt stumbling out of the trees. Poor guy."
7.“A prisoner tried to escape in the most James Bond way. A helicopter landed on the roof of the prison and he broke out of his cell and jumped on the helicopter.”
– u / CheesyRomantic
8.“I worked in a grocery store in a pretty sketchy area of New Brunswick, so we would get robbers pretty often. Loss Prevention once caught a guy that was attempting to steal ground beef packets by stuffing them down his pants and his shirt.”
" Not the enceinte crime but the aspect of overplus when he was caught and had to take them all out … priceless . "
– uranium / karineexo
9.“Leg-In-Boot Square in Vancouver got its name from an incident in 1887 when a leg in a boot washed up on shore there. The Vancouver PD stuck it on a pike outside the station in case its owner came by looking for his leg. When nobody showed up, they gave it to a stray dog.”
– uranium / Cam2600
10.“A kid two years older than me in my small town got drunk and rode a riding lawnmower through the community garden and got a DUI.”
" Do you hump how hard you have to render to get caught at something like that when there is one patrol car for multiple towns and rural areas ? It was impressive . He was only 15 and could n’t get his license for several years past the legal age . Kurt was a especial kind of stunned . "
– u / Dickduck21
11.“A friend of mine in Brantford, Ontario robbed the Armoury and stole hundreds of guns. With no firing pins. They got off nearly Scott free; they only wanted all the guns returned.”
– atomic number 92 / terryszc
12.“One winter, some guy knocked on an old lady’s door and offered to shovel her walk for $10. She agreed and allowed him to use her shovel. He completed the work and she paid him, but later, she was pretty sure the shovel that was leaning against her house wasn’t her shovel. She called the cops to report this guy took her shovel and left her a different one.”
" They ’ve got 3 officer at the crime research laboratory working on the cause . Got them working in shifts ! "
– uranium / TheLeathal13
13.“In 2015, in the town of Beaverlodge, Alberta, a group of pranksters pulled off a bizarre and amusing heist. They targeted a beloved local landmark: a life-sized beaver statue in front of the town’s visitor center. Under the cover of darkness, they managed to dislodge the heavy statue, load it into a pickup truck, and drive away.”
" The next dawning , the town was appalled to incur their iconic beaver omit . The police launched an investigation , and the story quickly pull in national attention , laughable Canadians everywhere . After a few days , the beaver statue was found unharmed in a nearby field , having been abandon by the pranksters .
The statue was revert to its rightful place , and the townsfolk celebrate its good return . The pranksters were never take hold of . "
– u / PippaPrue
14.“The numerous men (yes there’s been more than one) who have hidden in outhouse toilets/port-a-potties to look up at women. Some have worn wetsuits.”
– u / Valkyrie1006
15.“One where I actually know the guy was a dude who got caught smuggling things into the local jail up his bum. They published it in the papers. Said that his ‘rectum yielded 14 grams of marijuana, 2 ounces of tobacco, 2 packs of papers, 100 pills, and a lighter.'”
– u / ald1233
16.“A guy in the city I live in was car-hopping and literally jumped into the lap of an unmarked cop.”
" It was all over our local radio display , and I really knew the guy who did it . "
– u / TitanFodder279
17.“Somebody in Windsor some years back who was trimming a bush into adick shape.”
" I imply , that ca n’t be legal , but it ’s pretty suspect . "
– u / BlueLeafs
18.“We had a guy in town too drunk to drive, so he took his ride on lawnmower up the street to the fast food place, and tried to drive it through the drive thru. Him explaining his logic in court was pretty funny.”
– u / Rich - Ad-4466
19.When I was a teen, one of the neighbourhood teens was arrested for breaking and entering. The home he broke into had large glass windows and a stairwell with a glass window spanning the 1st to 3rd floor. He was walking around with a candle in the dark, and all the neighbours called the police as he was very visible with that candle while walking up the stairs."
– u / Tricky_Parsnip_6843
