We want to see your linear perspective !
People approach long-term relationships with different mindsets, expectations, and values. While it’s increasingly considered “the norm” to have a physical relationship with your partner before marriage, many people still choose to refrain from sexual activity until they’re lawfully wedded. This decision may be entirely personal, or it can be rooted in religious beliefs or cultural practices.
All individuals and couples make this decision for themselves. While some folks feel empowered by their choice and wouldn’t have it any other way, others may feel conflicted or even remorseful.
Perhaps you had a religious upbringing and were scared of the potential consequences of premarital sex, but you and your high school boyfriend also wanted to be intimate. He proposed right after graduation, and you two stayed in your hometown and married rather quickly. You finally had sex on your wedding night, but it was awkward and over quickly. You had built it up so much in your head and felt let down by the whole experience. You could’ve left home and gone off to college with your peers, but you felt like you had to get married to keep your relationship. In hindsight, you wish premarital sex hadn’t been so demonized because you definitely would not have rushed into marriage.
Maybe you decided you wanted to wait until marriage to have sex because that made you feel the most comfortable. You weren’t influenced by religion or outside factors; it’s just what you wanted. You found an understanding and patient partner, and you eventually got married. Your sexual chemistry was so strong because you spent a lot of time growing a deep emotional connection and exploring intimacy in different ways. Though you know it’s not for everyone or every relationship, you’re personally glad you waited until marriage and feel empowered by your decision.
Or, maybe you were taught from an early age that abstinence was crucial and that no man would ever want you as his wife if you had sex before marriage. This took a toll on your mental health and left you with a warped view of your body and your sexuality. You had to undergo a lot of therapy and deprogramming to process your baggage, and you ultimately think such a shame-based system is detrimental. You believe no one should be told one way or another what they should or shouldn’t do with their bodies. Sex lives are private, and people should get to determine what’s best for them. Whether that’s waiting until marriage or having as many sexual relationships as you want, you don’t care. You wish you had been free to determine what was best for yourself.
We want to hear your perspective!