Not the barbate dragon …
Congratulations, you’ve (almost) survived all the chaos and heat of summer 2024!!!
We went from August 1st to Aug 15th in just 5 mins . It ’ll be Christmas in a few hour
I think that deserves a little cool down and a treat. So, here are some funny, silly tweets to keep you happy before the Christmas displays go up next week:
Enjoy !
1.
I of late taught my kiddo how to make my iced burnt umber bc she loves to be involved- it ’s always made so well & the other day something just mat off- this first light she made my coffee & while she was doing the espresso she order “ sometimes you need extra energy .. so I do 4 scoops ”
2.
grow up there was a cody in every elementary school class but as an adult i have n’t meet a cody in year . where did they go
3.
whitened people be like hey Isle of Man I ’m Connor
4.
He look like a bearded flying dragon that is commonly allowed to roam around the sign but ca n’t today because relatives with a humble child are visitinghttps://t.co/tQl04XlQHH
5.
my therapist : matthew , i need you to understand that kamala harris is not texting you.my texts : pic.twitter.com / ZTK2J2mYaJ
6.
You ever dance so spoiled that you get criminally investigatedhttps://t.co/06d5qQuiJ2
7.
this is what my setup count like when I announce myself tomato city manager of the James Leonard Farmer marketpic.twitter.com/BFywN7h7Il
8.
Ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to take PTO
9.
NobodyJesse McCartney in 2004 : https://t.co / cpLOx53nJd
10.
11.
he ’s doing the Malus pumila dancehttps://t.co/MxgV17MOR1
12.
blend in to my buddy ’s house and he recollect this absolute monster was gon na slip by without further inquirypic.twitter.com/1erZU8Ifrb
13.
ill bet dour cream and salsa do nt really like eachother on a personal stratum but when they get in the studio together its undeniable
14.
digital audiotape why ppl was randomly throwin up in kindergartenhttps://t.co/94ebXk2c80
15.
never making a literal again smhpic.twitter.com/bQA9rGCnrH
16.
i m crying i ordered a turtleneck Ananas comosus bun at dim total and ten Amoy later the waitress comes out apologizing extravagantly like " we ’re so drab it fall out really ugly . do you want it still we ’ll give it to you for free " YES OF COURSE anyway i love him . he was deliciouspic.twitter.com/7hmkteKMX2
17.
We ’re follow “ take it On”https://t.co / xvGggjHNv3
18.
By the clip i m through with hinge i will have a fully furnished apartmentpic.twitter.com/cnuYSPSf2A
19.
sneaking therapy tips into conversation with my mom like how u give a wiener a tab wrapped in cream cheese
20.
vitamin D was probably like “ lmao ok ” when they key out the alphabet the ABCs
21.
i feel like i would ’ve crushed it in ancient greece….yayyyy purchasing Olea europaea oil yayyyy walking to the agora yayyyy catch some Z’s with my live neighbour because both our shithead husbands died at sea yayyyy pouring out wine-colored for a goddess so she does n’t flex me into a spider
22.
say this client how much his total was and he tell me that he can read
23.
men proposing after 8 yearshttps://t.co/yOS1Fg52ss
24.
I hope they got marriedhttps://t.co/oCyOQFblMP
25.
26.
when a alien on the train enounce to you “ is this the train to _ _ _ _ _ _ _ ” and you say “ i hope so ” and then you both laugh 👍 👍 👍 👍 👍 👍 peak aliveness mo
27.
cure me salt and vinegar buffalo chip . if you could hear me salt and vinegar chips i ’m asking for a miracle . salt and vinegar chip please pull through mehttps://t.co/oUzjkvlvry
28.
last night there was a party in my apartment and while i was make a sandwich in the kitchen someone i do n’t make out issue forth up to me and said " are you allowed to do that "
29.
stop doing computer skill we need ROCKSTARS
30.
Me : This is my darling . I would wish to buy this precise same item of article of clothing againThe Fashion Industry : No .
31.
A key technique to finding courteous stuff used is to painstakingly search what you want and then look for list that fathom like a caveman write them “ old speakers ” “ vacum ” “ expresso ” “ tv old need gone ”
32.
me googling the number that forebode me or else of answering it like an adultpic.twitter.com/xPcs4Rni4x
Don’t forget to shoot these creators a follow if you liked their tweets! And for more funny tweets, check out our recent roundups:
Laughter ’s The Best Medicine , So Here ’s 29 Funny Tweets From The Week
43 Hilarious Tweets From Another Very , Very Funny Week Of Summer
