allow ’s facilitate the back - to - school heebie-jeebies with some laughs !
It has been scientifically proven that jokes are good for the soul! Why not make the school routine just a little easier with some cheesy, light-hearted humor? You’ll laugh so hard you might just need a shoulder to CRAYON.
Let’s finish the school year off right with some epic school jokes:
1.“How do you organize a space-themed school event? You planet.”
2.“When is a blue book not a blue book? When it has been read.”
3.“What’s an English teacher’s favorite dinosaur? Thesaurus Rex.”
4.“Why can’t you take all of your acting classes at once? You have to take them in stages.”
5.“Why did the computer teacher quit? He lost his drive.”
6.“Why was the ghost so excited for his first day of school? He had school spirit.”
7.“Why is the library always the tallest part of any school? It has the most stories.”
8.“What did the cheerleader wear to the big school dance? Her prom proms.”
9.“Why was the blanket so confident before the test? It had the material covered.”
10.“Why didn’t the sun go to college? It already had a million degrees.”
11.“Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Cause they make up everything!”
12.“Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them!”
— kickypie
13.“How do you cut someone’s arm off in woodworking class? Whittle by whittle.”
— jasonhamrick
14.“What can you say about a horrible mummy joke? It sphinx!”
15.“What do you call a biscuit that is more intelligent than you? A smart cookie.”
16.“What do you call a detective that accidentally solves crimes? Sheer Luck Holmes.”
— StockInitial4460
17.“After stealing all of the punctuation marks from the keyboard, the judges are…expecting a long sentence.”
18.“I want to tell you a joke about a girl who only eats plants. You’ve probably neverherbivore.”
— gotmojo6
19.“I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!”
20.“A man died today when a pile of books fell on him. He only had his shelf to blame.”
21.“What do you call a duck that gets straight A’s in school? A wise quacker.”
22.“Why didCinderellaget kicked off her soccer team? Because she kept running away from the ball.”
23.“Why were the fish’s grades bad? They were all below sea level.”
24.“Why did the eraser add insult to injury? It likes to rub it in.”
— ebeisaac
25.“Little Johnny: Teacher, can I go to the bathroom? Teacher: Little Johnny,mayI go to the bathroom? Little Johnny: But I asked first!”
26.“Did you hear the joke about the broken pencil? Never mind. It’s pointless.”
— AaliyahNoor
27.“Why did the student throw a clock out the window? Because he wanted to see time fly.”
— MeepRJ
28.“Why did the kid eat his homework? Because his teacher said, ‘it was a piece of cake.'”
29.“Why does a moon rock taste better than an Earth rock? It’s a little meteor.”
— UYScutiPuffJr
30.“What world capital has the fastest growing population? Ireland. The capital is Dublin every day.”
31.“How much do neutrons cost? Nothing, they’re free of charge.”
32.“What do you call it when Hagrid takes a ceramics class? Hairy Potter.”
33.“What US state has the smallest drinks? Mini-soda”
34.“How do you tell the difference between an alligator and a crocodile? You see one later, and one in a while.”
35.“How much do rainbows weigh? Not much; they’re actually pretty light.”
36.“What baseball player has the shortest commute? The catcher, he works from home.”
37.“What did one tectonic plate say to another when they bumped into each other? Sorry, my fault.”
38.“Why are math teachers always so upset? They have so many problems.”
39.“What do you call a second-place trophy in an astronomy contest? A constellation prize.”
40.“Who invented fractions? Henry the 1/4th.”
41.“Why are Saturday and Sunday the strongest days? All the rest are weakdays.”
42.“How do bees get to school? The school buzz!!!”
— CryptoReaper5
43.“Where do math teachers go on vacation? Times Square.”
44.“What do all the cool kids learn at school? Algebrah.”
45.“Why did the student show up to school covered in wrapping paper? His teacher said he had to be present!”
— Anonymous
46.“A lady asked me if I needed help when I was choking on some alphabet pasta. She took the words right out of my mouth!”
47.“There’s a new airline for book lovers. It has a large library of popular books. It’s called Jane Air.”
— Hefy_jefy
48.“A woman walks into a library and asks if they have any books about paranoia. The Librarian: ‘They’re right behind you!'”
49.“I’m reading a book called Anti-climax at the moment. The beginning is really good.”
— SheldonE65
50.“Why did the cross-eyed teacher get fired? She couldn’t control her pupils.”
— CorrectTowel
51.“Why did the scarecrow win the Nobel Prize? He was outstanding in his field.”
52.“What’s a snake’s favorite subject in school? Hiss-tory!!”
53.“Why can’t a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.”
— FunEntersTheChat
54.“How was the Roman Empire cut in half? With a pair of Caesars.”
55.“What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.”
— TrustMeImLeifEricson
56.“I’d tell you a chemistry joke, but all the good ones argon.”
57.“A neutron walks into a bar. The bartender says ‘for you, no charge.'”
— kesh_from_downunder
58.“What did the tree say when it looked in the mirror?GEOMETRY!”
59.“I was reading a book on helium. I couldn’t put it down.”
— Professional - Tower76
60.“Photons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic.”
H/T:r/cleanjokes,r/matheducation,r/jokesforkids,r/dadjokes,r/kidjokes,r/AskReddit, andr/funny
This post has been edited by Kaitlin Stevens .
